Mother's Day for All Kinds of Mothers

Mother's Day.

Confession:  I never have enjoyed going to church on Mother's Day.

Year after year, Mothers are asked to stand to be honored. New mothers. Mothers of many. The oldest mother. The mother with the most children in attendance with her. Grandmothers. All so sweetly stand; and they should. Motherhood is an honor. A calling. A sacrificial life. More than a role, it is a divine assignment.

It simply never was in my life journey. Not through childbirth, anyway.

I know all the scriptural promises for the barren woman and how her children will be numerous. I've prayed those scriptures many times.

But when this Hallmark day comes around each year, I know what it means: Mothers of children---natural born and adopted.

It always gives my heart a 'ping'.

This Mother's Day, I miss my Mom who went to be with Jesus 11 years ago. I miss her greatly but even that wasn't the reason I didn't want to go to church.

Mother's Day Roses from My Dudley :)

I have two lovely step-children whom I call my own and they are truly mine. Not substitute kids. Not second-best. But truly mine in this life--even though I obviously share them with their natural mother and always defer to her. Believe me--this post is not to minimize how much I love my (step)children!!! :)

But again---this day is not about step-mothers.

(...and I will cut you if you mess with my SKids.)

 So even over the last 7 years of being a step-mother, when mothers are asked to stand in church on Mother's Day, I sometimes stand but there is something of an 'imposter' feeling that comes over me.

This 'ping' is the most annoying thing in the world.

I have been at peace with not having born-to-me-children. Truly. But because of judgments and painful words, I allowed myself to feel 'less'.

Man, I am so DONE with that!

So, today I went to church. On Mother's Day. Again.

During worship, I was pressing into God's Presence...asking Him to pull me into the river of His love. The fact that it was Mother's Day was no longer on my mind. My mind was on Him.

Then, He overwhelmed me.

His presence was so powerful, I immediately felt weak.

And then He said, 

         "I am changing your name from 'barrenness' to 'Baroness'."

Whoa.

I was ambushed with love.

I began to weep uncontrollably. No, 'weep' isn't a strong enough word. Bawl is more like it--and loudly. Thankfully the worship music was powerfully moving at that time in a volume that drowned my crying. The innermost, deepest part of me was shaking -- literally racked with sobbing.

"Baroness?"

In that moment, I wasn't sure I knew all that means and I am still asking Him to teach me. I imagine it will unfold over time.

I kept saying in amazement, "Change my name? That changes who I AM! How does someone just do that?--change someone's name!!??"

A scripture followed:

Ephesians 4: 14-16  "For this reason I kneel before the Father, from whom every family in heaven and on earth derives its name. I pray that out of His glorious riches He may strengthen you with power through His Spirit in your inner being."

Uh, Yep...the Father who has named all families just changed my name.

Annnnnnd that bit about the 'power through His Spirit in my inner being'... yeah, that would be the part of me that is violently shaking, crying and feeling weak right now!! :)

I have to say my favorite Baroness is Margaret Thatcher:

("Hmmmmmm. That would definitely involve hats, gloves and brooches. I'm OK with that.)

Of course I had to look it up in Google:  "A Baroness is the female equivalent to a Baron. So one can become a Baroness by either being married to a Baron or by having that title bestowed upon herself. Baron is a specific title of nobility ..taken itself from Frankish baro meaning "freeman, warrior".

Free(man); Warrior. I'll take it!!

I am still soaking it in. What does it all mean?

I know this: I sure like the name 'Baroness' better than 'barrenness'!

Isaiah 41: 18  "I will make rivers flow on barren heights, and springs within the valleys. I will turn the desert into pools of water, and the parched ground into springs."

And, as I have all month long, I keep praying,
               "Fill all my waste places. Fill all my waste places. Fill all my waste places."

Even the ones that I thought were already 'ok'. :)

Proverbs 20: 27  "The spirit of a man is the lamp of the Lord that sheds light on one's inmost being."

Shine on, Lord...and keep on filling me.

Best. Mother's. Day. Ever.

And for those of you who can relate, this is for you: